OKAY... so... I'm a really pleasant guy. I'm OVERLY pleasant. I go out of my way to smile at people, thank the lady on the speaker at the drive thru, and shake hands with anyone who helps me find something at Best Buy. I don't make a fuss, and I KNOW what retails is like, so I let people do their thing! I don't want fussy customers when I'm working, so I try my absolute best NOT to be one.
But today argghhh....
Last week when I dropped off prints at the Post Office, I was berated for writing "DO NOT BEND" on them. Apparently this is only allowed if you are shipping things labeled as PARCEL or PACKAGES. But you know what? I DO ship all of my prints as Parcel! That way they are treated with more care, and I can label them as DO NOT BEND.
However, APPARENTLY I have to use USPS's DO NOT BEND stickers. Which is total bullshit. HOWEVER, I decided to humor USPS today, and I went with my envelopes unlabeled. I asked the nice grumpy lady for DO NOT BEND stickers. She said, "Dose only for parcel pacakages you ain' low'd to use those."
I said, "Please scan them. I payed for these to be mailed First Class Parcel."
She did. Then she said, "Okay but "We ain't got none sor."
So I said, "Well, can I have them back so I can write 'Do Not Bend' on them?"
She said, "No I can't give you dese back once I take 'em. Dey logged in."
"Well how will they know not to bend them, then?"
"Dey gon' know it's in the da barcode."
"The carriers know how to read barcodes?"
"They gon' know cuz iz sorted dat way."
This continued back and forth until I asked for a manager, who she assured me was on break. So in the end, I was forced to leave them unmarked... My family has a pretty good presence in the USPS, and having seen in person that fucking beast of a machine that replaced the old LSMs, I do KNOW that, yes, they will be sorted "dat way." But I also know that the average carrier honestly does not care about their cargo. MAIL GOES IN BOX. THE END.
While they'll be sorted as fragile, I DO hope that the fucking MAILMAN knows better than to bend these precious things... But, PLEASE let me know if anything is bent beyond repair by the postman this week!! This doesn't affect those of you who ordered posters, as you'll get fiberboard tubes to fit them, as usual!
From now on I'm just going to label them before hand again, they can suck my slugbox. Fuck the official stickers.
